She has always wished she was someone else. Wanting to live the fictional life of what she is not. Dreams that actually can't be wished for. She lies awake watching the stars on her own little artificial sky changing positions and her fate simultaneously. Illusions... making a deliberate attempt and bringing them to the right angles to make the destiny thing right for her… stars foretelling what she thinks her life should be.
The stars are phony, so is destiny, they are just mere stickers on ceiling… with glow-in-the-dark feature… her life being the only truth as of now… she is never gonna be onyx’s “B”… she will only keep wishing. She wants to be her… no matter how much she hopes that he would fall in love with her… she just wishes she was “B”. Or for that matter she was in some movie… coz then dramatic things would happen to her. She would find everything she needs or lose everything she has… it won’t be some in the mid way of hanging between her dreams and wishes and the pain of not having. Her character so fictional that no one would believe that someone could live her way.
She goes on wishing. This life is fictional. It’s not happening to her. She has convinced herself that this cannot be happening to her. How could it? She doesn’t deserve this. She wasn’t made to be so hurt. She can’t deal with this… she lies back… her face buried in the pillow, screaming at her destiny. Wishing the stars would drop away, she realizes they are artificial. She can just rip them away…
these stars are too far away.
She cant reach even these…
onyx is further than the real ones…
currently reading: starting with dostovesky tomorrow...
1 comment:
i think we all wish we were somebody else... i wish so too... i wish...
damn
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