Monday, August 14, 2006

public demand.....

ive been here after a long time....
just gonna write some few things...
for those who dont know....."i broke up with the one man i loved more than my life" rather to put it this way he got sick of this 'psycho'...what did i expect anyway??how long wud someone have tackled me.....

ummm what else.....ive gone back to work....college is going gr8....i hate 'pattern making' , more so coz th faculty sux...she is bad .......
listening to a lot of rock these days.....smoking like crazy....and drinking almost every evenning.....nidhi is very upset......and i only got more hurt seeing her.....
it feels good to see people in love..but now i keep thinking "how long will it last?" ....."do they also get sick /tired of each others love?"
hoping that they dont fall apart.....i have a bargain.....if god has separated me and sam i cant help it.....but if he does that to others too i dont know ....does love, god , faith have any meaning....??? any of it....??it exists but in my life.....ive been waiting for things to go right for once in my life....and as soon as they look a bit ok everything gets tossed about....
should i care......????about my life at all.....im living...sake of it.....for ppl who think i am a fighter...i guess they never looked closely....they wud have found me such a loser...losing has become a habit..pretty much like a second me......
haha
"ure just an angel who stabbed my heart"

7 comments:

starry said...

Shadows I was so happy to see you here. dont look back, look forward and you will fing your true love. all guys are not the same.there is someone special waiting for you.later on in life you will look back and wonder if that was really true love. I know how it feels to be heart broken , have been there. especially if you loved him more than life itself. I think he is the looser in this. Everything is going to be ok.Time does Heal.

Anonymous said...

hi starry!
well i know time heals....its the pain now that is my concern....basically i m ver strongly affected by m emotions.....i mean reall strongl...so i wont be driven by what i may see tomorrow but what i have now.... that creates problems....i react and act acc to wats happening in my life today....
yes it was true love...i dont regret any moment spent with him....i never will....even if i manage to get someone else he wont be able to take sams place in my life....he dint lose anything....he just lost me as a person....i love him still and will always do....i lost his love, his presence, our smiles, fights, dreams, ...everythin..he was thr wen i needed him the most.....i guess also i lost him wen i needed him too....funnily i know thr r a lot of things he has taken away....but one thing he cant ever take away....the memories we share....they are enough for life time.....wen i fell in love with him i never bargained he will love me back...he did....gave my most amazing moments... now he has gone...left behind all those things and a lot of love and pain...hav to live with that.....just hoping that god has given him happiness in all this even if he took away my smiles .....ummmm life...i used to think that i wud never lose faith in people...22 yrs ive spent building it....i lost faith..in people in love and in god...

namit said...

hey life teaches lessons all the time....it pains like hell and the worst aprt abt it is nobody understands they all try to console and help in their way but in this situation nobody can help u. you have got to help ur self. all i would say is look forward .....u would find ppl who love u and expect to be loved back....nobody is a looser its just the rising and falling waves and one has to ride. keep the faith.......

Anonymous said...

hey hagrid,
if i love expecting love in return, did i love?

"kya hua jo agar mil na sake hum, kya hua jo mere wadon mein na dum, pyar to hua na kam"

this was our, one of the favourite songs even when we knew we'll be separating soon...

yaar one moment of love spent in his/her company was enough... i dont need more

HARRY aka adi

Anonymous said...

u didnt reply to the last comment...

Movie Mazaa said...

I can sumup everything that I learned abt life in three words - It goes on.

Robert Frost.

Aparna Mudi said...

it does go on....it is going on.....but a very wierd version of me...i never new this shadows before.....